A Little List of Lies about Leprechauns

Why, top o’ the mornin’ to ye! Turns out, it’s St. Patrick’s Day, and what’s everybody thinkin’ about St. Patrick’s Day? Green, shamrocks and leprechauns, of course! But pretty much everything you were told about these little buggers is a lie. Like, literally 90% of it. So let’s clear some things up about leprechauns, with a list of lies and truths.

Lie: Leprechauns come from Ireland.
Truth: Leprechauns totally did not come from Ireland. According to the early tales, they actually came from the sea, in the Leprechaun Kingdom under the water. They were water fairies, actually, and would try to drown people semi-regularly. Not very nice elves, as you can tell.

Half-lie: Leprechauns look like bearded midgets.
Ok, so this isn’t totally a lie. It really all depends on what you mean by midget. If by midget, you mean someone who’s so tiny a blade of grass just reaches their kneecaps, then yeah, I suppose they’re midgets, because that’s about how big the Leprechaun king is. So yeah, midgets… midgets you could drown in a beer bottle. But they likely did have beards. How a beard would be of any use to a water fairy I have no idea.

If they weren’t water fairies already, these guys would all die in a local rainstorm.

Lie: Leprechauns shine shoes!
Leprechauns really didn’t care too much about shoes until the 19th century. Apparently that idea came from the similar sound of the word leprechaun and some Irish word involving shoe-shining. But they could help you breathe underwater! That’s just what a rather nice little fairy would do, wouldn’t it now?

This wee chap is living a lie.

Lie: Leprechauns are cute little creatures made for children!
Hah! Those who haven’t read the stories wouldn’t know, but the horror series Leprechaun isn’t too far off. Leprechauns are evil little buggers. The original version would try to kill you. The new versions you see nowadays probably won’t, but they will definitely lie to you, or just straight up drive you insane. Finding a leprechaun’s treasure is harder than it seems. Even if they tell you exactly where it is, you still won’t find it.

Lie: They all wear green!
As it turns out, not all of them wear green. Some of them wear red, in fact. Why is it that one of the biggest jerks in fairy history wears Christmas colors? I can’t entirely say. Maybe they’re just very interested in Christmas fashion.

#rebel.

Hope you learned some fun things from all this! Have an excellent St. Patty’s day, and most of all, watch for leprechauns! 😉

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