Truly the most narcissistic book of all time. #books #humor #bookstagram
Truly the most narcissistic book of all time. #books #humor #bookstagram
May you one day be as happy as this elephant.
I decided that I should try out getting a Vine. We’ll see how it works out.
See vine below and follow Gabriel Penn!
So, interesting story. It’s totally true, by the way. And it’s short. The holy trinity of a good story.
We were out at lunch the other day with my nephews and nieces, and we were set to order. Specifically, we were ordering drinks.
Normally, if we are going out to eat, I’ll order a soda because we don’t go out too often. A special occasion ought to be celebrated in my mind. And if we’re celebrating, then I’m treating myself. But, although I love a good cold Coca-Cola, I don’t bother ordering it. At least here in America, it seems like most restaurants don’t serve it. You can ask for a Coke all you want, and they’ll always answer, “Is Pepsi ok?” They know it’s not ok that they’re depriving the world of a heavenly beverage, but they ask it anyway. Maybe they just see me coming and worry that I’ll drink it all. Admittedly, that probably wouldn’t be wrong. Either way, I order a Pepsi when I’m out.
But. BUT. This time something odd happened. She asked what I wanted, and I said “Pepsi”. She then replied, “We don’t have any Pepsi right now. Is Coke okay?
My eyes nearly welled up. This has never happened before, nor probably ever will again to me. But I responded calmly, “sure.” Inside I was singing praises. And I did get that Coke.
So, this is an encouragement to all the Coke lovers out there.
There is now hope.
(To all those severely worried about my mental health after reading this, yes, I am aware that there is not much difference between Coke and Pepsi. I grew up in a Coca-Cola-loving family, and therefore it is nostalgic to me. Allow me this moment of joy.)
Since I’m basically back-tracking for these next few days, I decided to do a whole blog on what exactly got me to be such a huge fantasy nerd as I am today. To do that, we must start at the very beginning. Birth: Both my parents are huge nerds in their own way. My mum is big into Star Trek and my dad is into Star Wars. My mum loves Narnia and my dad loves Lord of the Rings. I don’t think he’s…
Since I’m basically back-tracking for these next few days, I decided to do a whole blog on what exactly got me to be such a huge fantasy nerd as I am today. To do that, we must start at the very beginning.
Birth: Both my parents are huge nerds in their own way. My mum is big into Star Trek and my dad is into Star Wars. My mum loves Narnia and my dad loves Lord of the Rings. I don’t think he’s read the whole series but at very least he’s seen all the movies multiple times. I have no idea how they manage under the same roof, but they do it anyway.
Age 6: My mum reads my brothers “the Hobbit” while I listen in. Being that young, I probably shouldn’t have. Do you know how much the great and majestic Thorin Oakenshield’s death traumatises a six-year-old? Do you?
Actually, if you don’t know, that’s ok. Few do. If you don’t know that he died… I’d say sorry, but that book’s been out for nearly a century now. You should really catch up on these sorts of things.
Anyway, just so that you know, that messed me up for years.
But it got me a really good start into fantasy, so I’m not too upset about it.
Age 9: My parents get the entire Narnia series on audiobook. I become obsessed and listen to the whole thing about fifteen times. Oh, and the books? I read each book about three times. I had some issues with self-control. I mean, I still have those issues, but I used to have them, too.
Age 11: I read my first full novel, Eragon. I adore it and won’t even put it down while walking through Wal-Mart. I read the second book very soon after. I heard how the author was only fifteen years old when he published Eragon. Interesting.
Age 15: I try my hand at short stories. I make one in particular that my family loves – a story about three American and one Canadian soldier travelling through strange alternate dimensions, which turned out to just be my brothers and my cousin playing make-believe. Basically, it was Suckerpunch‘s dream sequences with guys instead of girls.
They tell me it should be longer. I promise to do so, eventually.
Now: I have finally finished the first draft of Dark Soldier, which looks nothing like its original version except for two characters from the original. But it’s been an epically awesome journey up until this point, I’ll give it that. And I’m finally going to be reading the whole Lord of the Rings trilogy coming this year. It’s just embarrassing that I haven’t.
For those interested in checking out the book, click here to go to the book’s official Facebook page.
And once again, I’ve made what could’ve been a short blog very long and drawn out. It’s like I took a medium-sized children’s novel and stretched it into three movies. But no, that’s just ridiculous. I mean, what kind of crazy person would do that?
Who am I? Why am I here? What do I want to accomplish? Why should you read this blog? In September of last year, I decided to push my limits and make a personal blog answering those questions. I wanted to tell people about life as a college student, an amateur writer, and as a Christian. It’s been almost a year since that first post. Now that I’m in Blogging 101, I’ve decided to come back to the…
Who am I? Why am I here? What do I want to accomplish? Why should you read this blog?
In September of last year, I decided to push my limits and make a personal blog answering those questions. I wanted to tell people about life as a college student, an amateur writer, and as a Christian.
It’s been almost a year since that first post. Now that I’m in Blogging 101, I’ve decided to come back to the basics. So let’s get started.
So, who am I? Well, I’m a young dude by the name of Gabriel Penn who really loves Jesus even more than his writing. And I really love writing. You have no idea. The people who read this blog regularly have some idea, but you new readers, oh… you’re in for a real ride with this blog. And for those who are wondering, my last name isn’t actually Penn. It’s a pen name. It’s one of the most glorious yet totally lame subtle jokes I have ever crafted in all of bad-joke-crafting history. And that’s saying a lot.
Why am I here? Because I believe that if you have a gift, you ought to share it with the world. All right, I’m not insanely epically talented, but it’s a gift. Like, if this gift were a car, it would be a Camry in the midst of a whole lot of Mustangs. But hey, it’s still a car, and it’s better than your own two feet. Especially for those who don’t have feet. But if you don’t have feet… how are you driving a car?
These are the great questions of life.
Also, I’m writing a novel, and I want to get the word out. Trust me, the word’s getting out. I reference it in some way in basically every other blog post. What I lack in Tolkienesque writing skills I make up for in persistence.
What do I want to accomplish? If nothing else, I would like to give people a bit of a break from the average and the everyday. I think that’s in some way what books and stories are all about. It’s about giving someone a step away from real life to teach them more about it. Apart from all the hubbub about novels and stories and writing tips, I want a blog that makes people think. The fact is that making another world is a great way to teach someone how to live in the current one. It’s like the Sims, but better.
Why should you read this blog? Well, you should read this blog because it has cool personal stories, even cooler written stories, stuff about my upcoming novel, occasional so-lame-its-funny humor, writing tricks I’ve picked up along my writing journey, and… that’s about it. Wow. That was so easy to summarize that it makes me a little sad inside.
In the continuing months, I plan to evolve the blog a little more. You’re going to be seeing more personal stories and intellectual thoughts alongside all the writing stuff. I don’t know how it’s going to work, but I’m going to take my road less traveled anyway.
Where no Gabriel Penn has gone before!
* ‘Star Trek’ theme sounding off into the distance *
Before I go too crazy, follow me if you have not already, give me a like, and comment your thoughts on all this!
“Love recognizes no barriers. It jumps hurdles, leaps fences, penetrates walls to arrive at its destination full of hope.” — Maya Angelou
Making the link between anarchism and Christianity.
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