Monthly Book Review Coming!

I have a saying. You should read a book for every ten selfies you take. Well, I don’t take many selfies, but I haven’t been into reading too much recently, either. So we’re going to change that! Once a month, along with all my writing posts, you’re going to get a full book review!

I haven’t decided what the first one will be. It’ll either be one of the many Neil Gaiman books I have lying around or Pilgrim’s Progress, which I just got in the mail today. Still not sure. But it’s a comin’! So watch for my first book review coming July 1, 2015!

The Return of Facebook!

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Hey, all! I’m sorry that I haven’t been very busy on here recently, but here’s an exciting new thing for you guys to get a hold of! Some of you know that I am on Twitter. But now I’m on Facebook as well! There was always the book page, but now there’s a distinct fan page for this WordPress account (and, therefore, one for me)! It’s called “Gabriel to Earth: the Fanpage”. Maybe it’s too wordy, but…

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The Return of Facebook!

Hey, all! I’m sorry that I haven’t been very busy on here recently, but here’s an exciting new thing for you guys to get a hold of! Some of you know that I am on Twitter. But now I’m on Facebook as well! There was always the book page, but now there’s a distinct fan page for this WordPress account (and, therefore, one for me)! It’s called “Gabriel to Earth: the Fanpage”. Maybe it’s too wordy, but hey! It works.

On there, you can actually message me, see stuff from my Twitter (soon, not just yet), get even MORE stuff than you’ll see on here, and just generally find awesome nerdiness. Whew! So excited!

To like us, just follow this link here ( https://www.facebook.com/GabrieltoEarth ) and give us a like! Let’s goooo!

The Thing: A Short Horror Story (Literary Lion: Escape)

A short prompted horror story from Gabriel Penn.

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I need to run, but I can’t move. Why can’t I move? It’s in here with me, and here I am, stuck and unable to move. I can’t die, not now, not here. I have so much more to do. I want to live! Just a few days ago, I would’ve never believed what’s going on now. But I was getting a coffee, and suddenly I saw it, poking around one of the shelves. Nobody else noticed it but me. I thought I was going…

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The Thing: A Short Horror Story (Literary Lion: Escape)

I need to run, but I can’t move.

Why can’t I move?

It’s in here with me, and here I am, stuck and unable to move. I can’t die, not now, not here. I have so much more to do. I want to live!

Continue reading “The Thing: A Short Horror Story (Literary Lion: Escape)”

Three People Walk Into A Bar…

…And they run into some wise old wizard. Cliche? You betcha. And it has to stop.

Tavern_for_Descent_by_feliciacano

…and it’s super cliché. I kid you not. Why is there always a bar or a tavern in a fantasy story? And why are the main characters starting fights in them? What if the main characters are underage? Admittedly, that doesn’t stop modern kids. But here’s three cliches in fantasy stories that I think should stop. 1. Everyone Has Swords Let’s face the facts. Swords are really expensive and take a long…

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Three People Walk Into A Bar…

…and it’s super cliché. I kid you not. Why is there always a bar or a tavern in a fantasy story? And why are the main characters starting fights in them? What if the main characters are underage? Admittedly, that doesn’t stop modern kids. But here’s three cliches in fantasy stories that I think should stop.

1. Everyone Has Swords
Let’s face the facts. Swords are really expensive and take a long time to make. And we’re just expecting peasants to randomly have swords available? They probably won’t. I want to see someone who fights with a pitchfork or something. Can we make this a reality? I think we should. Or give them a hammer. Or get them a sledgehammer even, mainly because that’s awesome. But please don’t give all of your heroes swords.

This one actually makes sense in context, because it’s a show of power. He didn’t just have all these swords lying around.

2. The Obviously Evil Badguy
Since we’re on the topic of bad guys, let’s talk about one that continues to bother me. Why are all the bad guys these ugly deformed things? I get the thought that deformity somehow equals corruption, but it’s just not right. Even Satan himself is considered the most attractive angel out there. He does not have horns. We gave him those.

That’s what’s so attractive about evil. It looks real good. So, if you want a really good novel that’s going to be remembered, make the reader question the good guys. It’s more fun that way.

3. A Great Lack of Variety
The Hobbit movie changed this up a bit, but I do have a qualm with Lord of the Rings. Gasp! With the father of all fantasy? How dare I! But here it is… all the elves and dwarves pretty much look the same. The elves all are prudes with smooth faces with blonde hair. The dwarves are all fat and bearded grumps. So I am thankful for the Hobbit movies in regard to changing that. Change things up!

DO YOU SEE THIS?! DO YOU SEE WHAT I’M TALKING ABOUT?

I realize that I’ve not even put out a book and I’m telling you all how to write yours. I’m not speaking as a writer, I’m speaking as a reader. Books without the issues I’m describing are things I would love to read. I could always be wrong. Maybe fantasy needs these to be a good fantasy. But I don’t think so.

What cliches would YOU like to see removed from the fantasy genre? Tell me in the comments!

Inspired by the prompt Fill in the Blank.